"Where the hell am I? How did I get here?"
Beginning at the age of 12, Jennifer Storm asked herself these questions many times after waking from alcohol-induced blackouts. During her teens and early twenties, Storm turned to alcohol to deal with the traumas in her life. In addition to alcohol, she also experimented with drugs, and eventually began using crack to deal with the deep black hole of sadness, loss, and unworthiness that she felt inside herself.
That is, until she awoke in a hospital psych ward and saw bandages on her wrists. "The doctor came in and said I was a very lucky girl to be alive," she explains, "and for the first time in my life, I believed it." She agreed to transfer to a rehabilitation center, though she wondered how life would be without alcohol and drugs. "Even as I asked myself this question, I quietly just knew I would never need them again. That inherent knowledge gave me a greater sense of peace than I had ever felt before. It was intoxicating in a whole new way."
I enjoyed this memoir more when it got towards the end, and Jennifer was in her healing process. The beginning and middle parts were difficult for me to read, mainly because I felt so angry at her for her actions. Her behavior was so self-destructive...and I felt sorry for her parents. This is why I gave it a three star rating. However, towards the end of her story, I warmed up to her a great deal. She overcomes her addictions, attends college, and chooses a profession that is perfect for her. I found this to be a good but challenging read.
- Paperback: 304 pages
- Publisher: Hazelden Publishing (February 15, 2008)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1592854680
- ISBN-13: 978-1592854684